Red Robin

Red Robin – Robson

Upstairs at the corner of Thurlow and Robson St, Vancouver

Website

Welcome to the land of: Burgers! Burgers! Burgers! of every imaginable variety…beef, chicken, fish, or veggie. Topped with everything from pineapples to guacamole to fried eggs. Yep, you can get it here at Red Robins. Need a tower of onion rings or a bottomless glass of strawberry lemonade? You can find it here. You can also find terrible service in the form of waitresses who sorta toss plastic menus your way and forget to bring you most every beverage your table orders. But at least they’ll admit to your face they’ve been ignoring you and promise to be better next time. What next time? I will actively try to avoid this hellhole in the future. 

Okay…why do places like this exist? It’s simply disgusting garbage paired with horrid service. How a place like this can stay open and flourish is beyond me. What you’ll be seeing here is the influx of the American invasion of Canada. Fatty meats of every sort in huge portions that all seem to be bottomless. Why?! If you can get full for around $10 why does it have to be “free refills” of EVERYTHING?! Aren’t we fat enough already? Seriously, they now have 250 locations on this god forsaken continent! Boo-urns! Plus, they have 4 “core values” one of which is the ever important ‘having fun’ — a definite must have in an establishment where the focus should probably have something to do with preparing food. 

Are we at a carnival or some sort of outdoor picnic that is mandatory for work? Get the chicken wings or the corn dogs. 

The wonderful state of Washington has given us so many great things: Sub Pop records, the Boeing company, amazing wines, sweet walla walla onions…..but this travesty of a restaurant is not one of those great things. 

This “restaurant” is a perfect dinning destination for teenagers, dirty breeders with their rugrats, and the unemployed obese. 

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Perfect pairing:

Fergie – The Dutchess

Much like Red Robin’s this album is tasteless and annoyingly popular.

or

Anything by Rob Van Winkle

Again, like Red Robin’s — it’s laughably bad. Ewwww, I think the 1990’s just barfed all over the place.

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